On Django Unchained. And why I can't bloody wait.

Quentin Tarantio.
Heard of him? He's done a few good movies with a few good actors and wrote a few good scripts for movies like KILL BILL, INGLORIOUS BASTERDS and PULP FICTION.
Educate yourself.
Done?
So here we go, if you are a Tarantino fan you will very well be aware that this guy's a sucker for Westerns. He's a sucker for that Sergio Leone music and that wide shot panning across a desert landscape, and a Tarantino western has been a long time coming.Yeah, Kill Bill had some western tones, but it wasn't a full-on guns-a-blazin' horse ridin' western worthy of someone as awesome as Tarantino.
So here we get Django Unchained; the story of a freed slave who sets out on a quest to rescue his wife who is held captive by a plantation owner in Southern America, starring Christoph Waltz as Doctor King Schultz and some other people in various roles here (but that really doesn't matter, it's Christoph's movie). And yes, the script got leaked. And yes, Miramax tried getting rid of it, but what the hell, it's the goddamn internet. You can't get rid of stuff from the Internet. That's where I got the goddamn Thor screenplay a good three months before it released.
The first time I read the script, I didn't like it that much. It just seemed like a wrong choice for Tarantino and felt like a mere Oscar vehicle for Christoph Waltz's bounty-hunter/doctor. Yes, there were awesome bits, there were funny bits, but cohesively, it wasn't very good for me. But that was the first time. When I reread it, I finally got it. This wasn't a bad script with a few good moments anymore; it was a BRILLIANT script with very few bad moments. It's actually very, very good. It may not be Tarantino's best movie yet, but I'll be damned if it doesn't turn out to be a freaking brilliant film and an amazing western.
What I really like about this film is that tackles an aspect of American history that no one has the balls to tackle: the rapes, the torture and the slavery. Tarantino gets to use his favorite N-word a lot given the period of the film and the subject matter it deals with and he handles it in style.
Boy, is this script violent. There's just a lot of blood. It's fucking bloodier than Kill Bill and more brutal on the senses than that BDSM scene from Pulp Fiction. If this movie gets made the way its written on the script, expect this to be Tarantino's most brutal film yet.
It's fucking violent. But what stops it from turning into a gorefest are two things : the humor and the story. This is by far, the funniest script Tarantino has ever or will ever write. It's just ripe with humor, from making fun of bumbling Hillbillies to slaves who gape at Django's ubercoolness. And it also hits the right emotional beats as expected of a Tarantino movie. The best thing about this script is that it's got a message, and how it will be delivered to the audience is brilliant. On the surface, it's an out and out Western that shocks and entertains, but what it wants the audience to remember is the message.
 It's a history lesson, people, and it's history rewritten by Tarantino himself.
And I can't fucking wait.

\m/

The Adventures of TINTIN review

Tintin taught me English.
No joke. Seriously, that's how I learnt the alphabet, that's how I learnt to read. It was Tintin all along. Little four year old Bob, holding a Tintin book in front of him, slowly turning the pages, absorbing the illustrations, trying to decipher those letters, yes, that was me. And I deciphered each and every letter (with some help from my grandma, ofcourse) and learnt the language. And after that was learnt, I sought out each and every other Tintin book and soon I had all 24 in my collection, and I read and reread them and I still do, and I love each and every one of them. So yeah. Tintin is special for me. Very special.
And so is Spielberg. If Tintin infused in me a love for the comic art form, Spielberg made me love movies. Jurassic Park was the first movie I ever watched, and I've watched all his movies since. Indy, ET, Close Encounters of the Thrid Kind, you name it.
And Moffat. Oh, what a wonderful creation of God he is. I loved his Jekyll, loved his Doctor Who work and got absolutely bowled over by that wonderful episode of Sherlock that he wrote. Heck, I'd go so far as to call him the greatest screenwriter the world has ever seen.
And he was working on Tintin. With Edgar Wright. And Joe Cornish. And Andy Serkis. And Pegg and Frost. And Peter Jackson. And John Williams. And Spielberg.
Now THAT is a perfect team, isn't it?
Yeah. I was freaking excited.
So, here we come to the million dollar question : Does it disappoint?
Somewhat. Yes, it does. But it's not a bad film. It disappoints because I expected so much more from it.
What it doesn't get right is surprisingly (or unsurprisingly if you believe in that proverb) the script. It's just a messy script. And it's obviously written by brilliant, brilliant writers because there are so many good moments, but it's problem lies in its confused tone and style. Moffat, Cornish and Wright are, no doubt, brilliant writers, but their styles are very different and unique. Moffat wrote the first draft and it's quite obvious, because the storyline is cleverly (very cleverly) mashed up from three books. And there are moments that are pure Moffat, especially the ending which is sure to delight Tintin fans and belay their fears that Professor Calculus' character wasn't done justice. That's him, that's Moffat's writing. Even my little brother could point that out. But after his first draft was done, Cornish and Wright worked on it and brought their fast-paced style to it, and that's where disaster struck. The result is a convoluted, confused screenplay that doesn't even know what it's style is. The tone, though, is consistent, and there are many moments when the screenplay shines, but we don't dwell upon those shining moments for enough time to make them magical. It's all a bit too rushed.

The Cinematography is PERFECT

But everything else is absolutely perfect. Everything. Spielberg directs the best action piece he's ever directed, thanks to the amazing motion capture technology. Motion capture shows its brilliance here and it's as if this technology was waiting for this movie, and Spielberg exploits it brilliantly. He takes the camera to places cameras have never been before, pulling off absolutely impossible shots, especially during the brilliant action scenes. I had seen some of the behind the scenes material from this movie and what they had done was create life-size models of the sets...in WIREFRAME! And Steven had a virtual "camera" in his hand that he could take just about anywhere and get absolutely any angles he desired. And oh, how he exploits that is nothing short of brilliant. You've got to see the movie to believe it.

Spielberg and Jackson with the virtual "Camera"

I could find no flaw in the acting. Every character is pulled off perfectly (Although Haddock is a bit too Scottish for my taste), and Jamie Bell shines as Tintin. Thomson and Thompson are pulled off well, but have very little screen time than they should have had. But every minor character is treated seriously, from Alan to the guy who sells Tintin the model ship in the flea market. I love the seriousness on display. Why can't we have more people like them acting in the movies, I wonder.
I bet these guys thought Haddock would steal the show with Andy Serkis at his bumbling best, but they were wrong. Tintin's loyal furry companion, Snowy steals it. Watching Snowy protecting his master, dodging bullets, jumping on cars and chasing eagles is an absolute charm. Expect him to win over your kids, your wives and your girlfriends, because this one's an absolute charmer.

And the action pieces are just brilliant. Micheal Bay should learn a thing or two about staging action scenes from Spielberg because with Tintin, he's proved himself a master of action. And I bet Peter Jackson directed a few shots because there are some moments of desperation and comedy that are pure Peter Jackson material. And they're brilliant.
Animation : Flawless. Except for a few scenes. The closeups on Tintin during the last few scenes look a tad unfinished and there's a shot were a woman looks as if she's made of plastic. But they get Herge's style right, it feels like Herge's universe. Even the animals look Herge-esque : in one of the shots, a camel looks as if it just burst out of the pages of a Tintin book. So big kudos to Weta for getting that right.

And finally, the score. Oh, the score. This is pure John Williams. This is him scoring the Indiana Jones, or the Star Wars, this is John Williams in top form! It's as if you're watching Spielberg's most unique film yet and the score just reassures you that it's still classic Spielberg. Although it's a tad reminiscent of the Indiana Jones score, (not that I'm complaining, though some of you will) it's still right, it's still brilliant. And it feels like a Tintin score, that's the best thing about it.


All in all, The Adventures of Tintin : Secret of the Unicorn is a good film. But not a great one, and that's what makes me sad. But I liked it nonetheless, because the direction, the animation and the music are so damn good. Also, the fact that it felt like an old-school Spielberg movie done with brilliant technology helped.
With a better script, this one would have been an Oscar Winner. Without it, it's not. But don't let that discourage you from watching this. And check it out in 3D. The 3D's brilliant on this one. No gimmicky-things-thrown-at-you stuff and darkened screens for a change. (Also, it's somewhat funny that a comicbook using Herge's Ligne Claire style would inspire such a beautiful 3D film, given the flatness of the comics.)
Expect "Red Rackham's Treasure" to be released in two years' time (or more, Jackson's working on Hobbit at the moment).

Final thoughts: GO WATCH IT. NOW. 

So, what do I rate this one?
A solid 7/10. And that's mainly because of the technical feats that they've achieved with this movie and the love and respect they've shown for the source material here, while adapting three books into one 109 minute long movie. With a more slower, solid script, this would have been a definite Oscar winner.




Also, Tintin fans, be very, very observant. There's Easter eggs galore. Even Cutts the butcher makes it into this movie! And the opening credits are PURE fanservice!